Every story has a beginning, a middle and an end. Which I’m sure you knew already.
If that was enough to start telling a story, then you probably wouldn’t be reading this book. Everyone would be an amazing storyteller!
But it’s not enough to tell a story. We need a bit more. We need to know what should happen at the beginning, what should happen in the middle and what should happen at the end. We need to understand the rules of sequencing, because these rules dictate what gets processed by the mind.
One recent example reminded me of the importance of sequencing right. I was on a group coaching call, listening to each person share a challenge they were currently facing at work.
The first person made no sense whatsoever. Their logic was like a butterfly floating in the air, going round and round in circles. I understood their words, but could make no sense of the story they shared. I had to ask lots of questions to understand what they were saying.
But the second person made perfect sense. Their logic was like a staircase, taking me step by step through their story, from the very beginning right to the end. By the end I felt a bit awkward because they were so clear I had no questions to ask whatsoever! Everything was crystal clear.
When it comes to logic, our mind is a bit like cat. If the logic is floating around in circles like a butterfly, then we try desperately to grasp at it, but can never quite get it. If instead it’s like a staircase, with a clear start, and a step by step order all the way through, then our cat can happily make it’s way to the top of those stairs.
If…Then…
As we saw in the section of revealing gaps in their maps, our minds create maps of our world to help us navigate it. These maps tell us that if we take a particular action, then we will get a particular result.
If I drink coffee, then I will feel more awake. If the clouds turn grey, then it will rain. If I cross the road, then I will get to the other side.
Our minds have a massive database of these rules which we use to decide how to respond to the world around us, by predicting what actions will lead to the results we want. As we live our life, we pick up more and more of these rules from experience.
Sometimes we also discover our rules are wrong. For example “If the skies are clear, then I don’t need to take an umbrella” has proven me wrong time and time again when the weather changes after a few hours! But when we discover our rules are wrong, we normally correct them and update our rule database.
This basically means that everyone already has a massive database of If…then… rules in their minds. Whenever you communicate with them, they use these rules to interpret what you’re saying. Regardless of whether they are right or wrong.
For example, recently I have been working with a Chinese team of consultants to help them communicate more effectively with their US counterparts. Each party has a completely different set of If…Then… rules that has caused massive misunderstandings. Particularly in meetings.
When going into meetings, the Chinese side takes the following rules with them:
- If I keep quiet, then I am showing respect.
- If someone senior is present, then I should agree with what they say.
- If I ask a question, then I might offend someone.
But for the US side, they take these rules with them:
- If I share my opinion, then I am contributing to the discussion.
- If anyone says anything, then I am welcome to challenge their thinking.
- If I ask a question, then I help everyone understand more.
You can imagine the kinds of challenges both sides face when meeting with each other!
No matter what the situation, if we are communicating with someone, they will be using their If…Then… rules database to interpret what we say. If everything follows their rules, then it all makes sense.
A safe place to start any communication is by sharing something that follows their If…Then… rules.
For example, in Bill Gates’ 2015 TED Talk “The next outbreak? We’re not ready”, he starts off with the following:
“When I was a kid, the disaster we worried about most was a nuclear war. That’s why we had a barrel like this down in our basement, filled with cans of food and water. When the nuclear attack came, we were supposed to go downstairs, hunker down, and eat out of that barrel.”
This immediately sets off the following rule:
“If he’s talking about nuclear war, then he’s going to talk about something big and serious”.
It also sets off this rule:
“If it’s a talk by Bill Gates, then it’s going to be about something that will have a significant impact on our future”.
Most people learn about nuclear bombs at school. Most people have learnt about the threat nuclear war poses for our future. This is a pretty reliable topic for triggering the “big and serious” rule.
Most people also know who Bill Gates is. Most people know that he’s very rich, and he’s using his fortune to invest in the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation to help solve global problems. Bill Gates is a pretty reliable speaker for triggering the “significant impact on our future” rule.
Whenever we open our communication, we want to do so by setting off the right If…Then… rules.
But this all has to lead somewhere, and this brings me to my next point.
Journey to and From a Goal
This morning, I decided to try a different cafe. I walked to one, but discovered it was already full. I went to another, but I didn’t like the feel of it. I then had to find another cafe. In that moment, my entire world was focused on one thing: Find a cafe.
I thought of a shopping mall nearby. I found a shared bike and made my way to that cafe. It had seats! I ordered my coffee and lunch and sat down, and in that moment my world changed. Suddenly, my entire world was now focused on one thing: Write this section.
Attention is goal driven. Whenever we want or need something, our attention will be directed towards achieving that. We will continue paying attention towards achieving that goal until we either reach some kind of resolution, or just give up.
But there’s also a bit more to it than attention.
Goals create the context for what comes next. The clearer the context, the more we will process.
For example, read the following passage and see how much you can remember afterwards:
This procedure, is straightforward enough, but for some can be so mundane that it becomes tiresome. It begins with placing the appropriate objects, which meet the prerequisites for this procedure, into the appropriate place. There are two main resources required for this procedure, and normally one tool used in combination with these resources, all of which should also be placed in the same place as those objects. The tool is then used in combination with those resources to manipulate those objects. Once manipulated, those objects are then moved to another location, free from the influence of those resources. Some people choose to leave these objects there until they reach the desired state all by themselves, whereas others prefer to use another tool to speed up the process.
You probably struggle to remember much of this at all. It is all so abstract, and completely without context. But what if I told you that this was a description for the procedure of washing up? Reread it with that in mind and see how much more sense it makes now, and how much more of it you remember.
Read with the goal of washing up in mind, we now know why we’re talking about all those different steps. When we know WHY, anything that comes afterwards will make so much more sense, and consequently be easier to remember.
Whenever we start a story or presentation, we want to start by leading towards the WHY. We want to take them on a journey of If…Then… cause and effect chains towards a goal.
Bill Gates does this in his TED Talk. After he’s brought us in with the nuclear war topic, he then says:
“Today the greatest risk of global catastrophe doesn’t look like this. Instead, it looks like this. If anything kills over 10 million people in the next few decades, it’s most likely to be a highly infectious virus rather than a war. Not missiles, but microbes. Now, part of the reason for this is that we’ve invested a huge amount in nuclear deterrents. But we’ve actually invested very little in a system to stop an epidemic. We’re not ready for the next epidemic.”
He’s now led us to a goal using perfect logic. If we invest so much money into nuclear deterrents, then we haven’t invested enough money into preventing the greatest risk of global catastrophe which is actually microbes. Therefore, we need to prevent epidemics.
He takes us on a journey through the Ebola outbreak, which had occurred not too long before that talk. This is smart, because most people don’t have a sophisticated bank of rules regarding microbes and epidemics. But at the time, most people had heard of Ebola and the fear it caused thanks to the media, and so developed a pretty sophisticated bank of rules for interpreting the meaning of Ebola. If it’s like Ebola, then that’s bad!
He talks about how Ebola didn’t spread so badly because it didn’t spread through the air. If there is an infectious disease that spreads through the air, then that becomes highly contagious.
He then shows us an animation of how the Spanish flu spread throughout the world in 1918 and killed 30 million people. If it’s anything like the Spanish flu then that’s really dangerous.
By this point, people understand very, very, very clearly what the goal should be. Prevent the next epidemic.
Once people understand what the goal is, we’ve opened their interest and created context. Now we want to take them on a journey of If…Then… cause and effect chains from the setting of the goal, to attempts to achieve the goal.
Now Bill Gates moves on to how to achieve this goal. He talks about a lot of things. So many things that it’s quite difficult to remember. But the implication is clear; if it’s all those things, then our governments need to take responsibility.
He talks about how the budget for this would be quite modest compared to the potential economic harm to the global economy of 3 trillion dollars. If that’s the damage, and the budget for preventing this is way less than that, then we need to take action.
Unfortunately, as I write this book, we are in the midst of the Covid-19 pandemic. It appears his talk wasn’t successful. He made the goal very easy to understand and value. But the solution was skipped over. Probably because a TED Talk is not really going to have the kind of audience that can take action on those things. And I guess the goal was not achieved because sadly, the world is a pretty complicated place.
If…Then…Goal…If…Then…
Every story has a beginning, a middle and an end. We start with If…Then… logic that leads to a Goal. Then we continue with If…Then… logic onwards from the goal. Stick to this kind of logic, and everything just makes sense.
So follow this template when you are considering how to build a logical structure:
1. Beginning: Share details that make sense that lead up to a goal
2. Middle: Share the goal
3. End: Share details that make sense that start from the goal and journey towards a resolution
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